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                  WHAT MAKES A GOOD POEM?

There are so many theories of aesthetics, so many toolkits for criticism, that a pick and mix approach is unavoidable.  And I can best illustrate critical judgment by example.  I am forced at the outset to mention standards.  I count mine to be, for this task, as rigorous as any.  I rule out only such radically anarchic approaches as might hold our best poems to be rubbish.  There are iconoclasts in every field and although I don’t discount them I’ve no space here to argue with them.  I use the following as a touchstone.

 

           G. M. Hopkins’ To R. B.

 

The fine delight that fathers thought; the strong

Spur, live and lancing like the blowpipe flame,

Breathes once and, quenchèd faster than it came,

Leaves yet the mind a mother of immortal song.

Nine months she then, nay years, nine years she long

Within her wears, bears, cares and combs the same:

The widow of an insight lost she lives, with aim

Now known and hand at work now never wrong.

     Sweet fire the sire of muse, my soul needs this;

I want the one rapture of an inspiration.

O then if in my lagging lines you miss

The roll, the rise, the carol, the creation,

My winter world, that scarcely breathes that bliss

Now, yields you, with some sighs, our explanation.

 

The paradox here of course is that, in apologising to his friend Robert Bridges for his lack of inspiration, Hopkins produces one of the most inspired poems in the language.  Look at the way he sustains the sonnet form, not a line of it ‘lagging’, to use his own word, not a part that does not sustain the music and the force of its central metaphor.  The muse’s engendering of a poem in the mind and the mind’s gestation of it are compared to human engendering and the bearing of a child.  I don’t intend to do an exhaustive analysis, trying to say everything possible about texture and rhythm, themes and images.  If a reader does not instantly see the allusions to ejaculation and pregnancy, he or she had better read more and return later:

 

                                                    the strong

Spur, live and lancing like the blowpipe flame,

Breathes once and, quenchèd faster than it came, . . .

 

There is daring in the alliteration throughout, and in the rhetorical figures, one of them comparing the invasion of the muse to a blowpipe flame, and the sowing of the poetic seed to an orgasm that is ‘quenchèd faster than it came’, the Jesuit priest born in 1844 not flinching from the verb ‘come’.

       The splendid line, ‘the roll, the rise, the carol, the creation’, has been much commended, and this statement of mine indicates that I do, to some extent, back the notion that works of art gain their status over time from a consensus among expert and lay readers alike, though I’m always aware of the pernicious pressures of fashion, and of social, even political, pressures (witness how our 18th century revered the rules of Horace; think of the intolerance the Nazi and Stalin régimes).  This line, ‘the roll, the rise . . .’, begins the last triplet and among other acts helps tie up the themes, via the rhyming of ‘inspiration’ and ‘creation’, which are central ideas.  Once I look at the rhymes I notice how elegant and economical they are, the octet relying throughout on -ong and -ame rhymes, the sestet interlacing -ation and -iss sounds.  Hopkins was audacious with words and ‘combs’ in line 6 needs some explaining.  From the ordinary meaning of raking hair one could get ‘straightens’ and hence ‘set in order’; from ‘comb’ meaning ‘honeycomb’ one might surmise ‘store’; from ‘comb’ meaning ‘coomb’ (Old English ‘vessel’, later ‘brewing vat’) could be added the sense of containing and fermenting.  It would be typical of Hopkins to imply all these.  As for ‘cares’ in the same line lacking the ‘for’ that it needs if it is to mean ‘tend’, one can find justification in Middle English where ‘for’ was not imperative; Hopkins often leaves out obvious link-words anyway.  At the time he wrote, there was an erudite ruggedness about his poetry which defied convention and which, along with his ascetic diffidence, restrained him from publishing.  It’s easy to see greatness in his work today, after so many developments have made him look almost normal, though still profoundly original.  Finding greatness in a contemporary is often harder than finding mere adequacy.

       This is all too brief a reflection but I’m now ready to say what I think makes a great poem.

       1.  It must be confident in message and attitude.

       2.  It must have an original voice.

       3.  Its phrasing must excite.  Think of two idioms blended to produce a strange new one.  There need not be strangeness everywhere, but certainly somewhere.

       4.  Its tune should satisfy those who understand its rules.  Genius invents its own rules but they are inevitably judged differently.  Tastes vary. 

       5.  Its texture, the relational weave of  sound (different from the dynamic pulse and cadence of the tune), should rise above blandness and safety.

       6.  Its argument and ideas should follow a logic: this may be a consistency of rhetoric and opinion, or a logic of verifiable statements about the world, or both, either fused or alternating.

       7.  Even in the lyric there is plot.  Plot tension should release by the end of the poem to leave no ‘What is this about?’ questions.  Rhetorical compression may linger: not all allusiveness need be clear by the end, though study should clarify the main references.  I personally do not like the obscurity of dense allusion and private codes even when the language around these has a quite striking dash and suggestiveness.  But I defend obscurity and fragmentation for the reason they were admitted into modern practice in the first place.  I could promote a ‘hard’ poem from ‘I don’t know’ to ‘very good’ if after study I’d got the hang of it and liked the reasons for its style.

       8.  A poem is a pattern of words.  Words refer to life.  The word-pattern of a poem therefore also alludes to life, it cannot do otherwise.  Even should the pattern float in a dream world, in every difference from life there is a remembrance of awakeness.  There may be distortions of meaning but that doesn’t matter.  A poem is an arrangement of words for the pleasure and enlightenment of those who understand how it works.  Pleasure integrates the self, enlightenment dissolves it.  The first leads to the second: a boundary is defined then dispelled.  A poetic pattern is not, nor can it be, merely art for art’s sake; much less can it be a utilitarian text from a book of information.  In the pattern one is looking for expertise in structure, which is the arrangement of parts.

       9.  Greatness can exist if there is excellence in only a few of these areas.  Great art dares to be flawed.

       I should now taste my own medicine and apply these precepts to Hopkins’ poem.  He is confident in the paradox of exhibiting unusual inspiration whilst bemoaning the absence of it.  His defiance of convention in language is bold, too.  Hopkins was a late Victorian and a near contemporary of Hardy and Swinburne, but not even these defiers of convention would have used the phallus allusions of the opening, the packed internal rhyming and rugged alliteration, the obscurity of ‘combs’ and grammatical omission of ‘for’ in:

 

                Nine months she then, nay years, nine years she long

                Within her wears, bears, cares and combs the same:

 

       A distinctive voice is immediately evident.  There is an exulting in life through language, with no self-pity even in this conventional lament, which is almost a polite apology.  This determined wrenching of a conventional subject in a conventional form is nonetheless graceful.    He puts the emphasis—on the nature of inspiration—in the octet, the first eight lines.  This is the way the muse impregnates, with the ‘fine delight’ which Hopkins disingenuously (though thence the charm) says he does not have.  The voice of a piece is hard to define.  Usually there in a characteristic style which carries a characteristic attitude to life and with that a tone of voice.  Hopkins has a religious fervour towards nature and its Creator, a serious desire to find in words an ‘instress’ or a knotting up of the intrinsic, the thisness of things, the ‘inscape’.

       Exciting language doesn’t have to be doing somersaults; it can be quiet and sweet.  In Hopkins, however, the language is always busy.   Take out a few phrases:

 

. . . delight that fathers thought . . .

. . . lancing like the blowpipe flame . . .

. . . quenchèd faster than it came . . .

. . . the mind a mother of immortal song.

 

        Sweet fire the sire of muse . . .

I want the one rapture of an inspiration.

 

My winter world . . .

. . . yields you, with some sighs, our explanation.

 

Having the verb ‘father’ take ‘thought’ as object; introducing a laboratory blowpipe at all; alluding to ejaculation; comparing a gestating poem to a human embryo; likening mental impregnation to sexual rapture; coming up with ‘My winter world’ as a description of mental sterility: what more originality of language could one ask for?  And there’s more . . . .

       The rhythm is not so extraordinary as in Hopkins’ most audacious pieces but it uses many of the techniques he developed when experimenting with what he called ‘sprung’ rhythm.  This used (1) an idiosyncratic way of counting stresses, allowing three or even more ‘slack’ syllables hang onto a stress instead of the usual one or two; and (2) a fondness for putting two or more heavy syllables together, as in

            stróng / Spúr                             Bréathes ónce

            Léaves yét                               Níne mónths

            náy yéars                            níne yéars

            wéars, béars, cáres                 áim / Nów knówn

            wórk nów név-(er)                 Swéet fíre

            óne ráp-(ture)                                  blíss / Nów yíelds

            sóme síghs.

He is not afraid of slipping two extra slack (unstressed) syllables into a normally five-iambus line:

 

         Leaves yet | the mind | a moth- | er of im-mor- | tal song.

 

There are other ways of scanning this but I’ve used the one he would have favoured himself.  Learning chiefly from each other, poets make up their own rules of scansion.  Hopkins went back to Anglo-Saxon metrics and invented a method of counting stresses that was eccentric: another mark of his style.  What his rhythm, or ‘tune’ as I’ve called it, does to help make this a fine poem is to advance the sense and, along with the texture, create an uplifting music that I’d want to listen to even if the sense were less interesting.

       Although not lush like Keats, Hopkins and Keats are to me among the most remarkable poets for texture: they both have an extraordinary instinct for finding the sounds they want for coaxing along their music.  See how the vowel-sounds dip and rise, close and open, in:

 

         (Leaves yet the) mind a mother of immortal song.

 

Look at the alliteration in every line, often double as in:

 

I wánt the óne ráp-ture of an ín-spi-rátion

 

and of course in:

 

         The róll, the ríse, the cá-rol, the cre-á-tion.

 

The ‘cre-á-tion’ disobeys the rules—only accented syllables are supposed to alliterate, but what the hell, you can break your own rules, and I seem to remember that there is precedence in Anglo-Saxon anyway.  This is but a brief note on texture; there are some, myself included, who think the weave of sound among the most affecting and effective ingredients, level with sense itself.

       But the sense is decisive.  Drivel and platitude are non-starters: however clever the music, banality embarrasses.  That said, a poet does not have to be saying anything of shattering originality: he or she might bitch about being jilted, about failing to expand the pupils and other parts of a beloved, saying stuff heard a thousand times before, yet still turn out a great poem.  Hopkins is not the first to lament the absence of the muse; the condition is not unusual and having a man apologising for it in verse does not add much to our sense of the horror of the human condition.  Poetic statements do not have to surprise, though it helps if they do.  It’s not silly for a poet to worry about writer’s block, but he’d better say it in a way we wouldn’t have thought of ourselves.  And, as I’ve said above, he’d better be emotionally logical—even factually logical if the facts are slippery.  For instance, I have to think twice when I come to the lines:

 

         The widow of an insight lost she lives, with aim

         Now known and hand at work now never wrong.

 

The mind has been impregnated with the seed of a poem which might take nine months, even nine years, to develop.  But pregnancies do not make widows.  The logic here tells us that after the planting of the seed the muse retires.  The rest is sweat and tears.  ‘The widow of an insight lost’ must mean that the muse, the fathering spirit, was momentarily like a husband, but it didn’t stay around to help develop the seed, that first idea or feeling for a poem.  The muse is the insight, and the insight leaves behind the seed.  I find this logically awkward; it would be better if the seed were the insight, but this is not what Hopkins has implied.  The muse, the insight, leaves after the seed is sown.  The womb of the mind must then nurture the seed even when the rapture of inspiration and the flash of insight are over.  The poet nevertheless knows what to do, that is to labour with ‘aim / Now known and hand at work now never wrong’.  I therefore find the last two lines of the octet the least satisfactory: I can force the logic to work somehow but I’m not happy about it.  Behind the insight-muse that leaves a seed is the implanting father / fire / sire: to the Catholic priest this can only mean God.  And that ties in with ‘immortal song’, ‘the carol, the creation’: poems are sacred devisings, they emanate from the divine.  I find the logic of this acceptable but I am even more impressed by the logic that keeps lacing together the images surrounding pregnancy and creation, the logic which leads to the brief sadness at the end concerning the mental barrenness of this poet’s ‘winter world’.

       Of plot tension and rhetorical compression (the counterbalancing elements of construction) I’ve written elsewhere.  Here the tension of ‘what is going on’ is for me satisfactorily dissipated by the end when I understand that he has tried desperately to convey how physical is the feeling of being touched by the divine spark.  It’s like a one-night (or one-second) stand with God; it’s like being fucked in the brain and dumped.  Then how forlorn is the barren feeling of not having been about a work of words for a long time!

       As for rhetorical compression, it is my belief that the better the poem the longer its language lingers in the mind, sustaining and famishing.  For instance, I’ve read this poem many times—indeed I know it by heart—but I’ve only now in writing this essay seen how to Hopkins a poem might be written long after the first intimation.  His Christian God the Father comes to him as a thunderbolt, with a road-to-Damascus insight, impregnating and then leaving him to nurture the seed with laborious patience.  It will take me forever to work this idea out in terms of my own beliefs about the mind and the world.  I may never succeed yet I can’t see myself ever tiring of this poem.

       As for ‘pattern of words’, ‘structure’, ‘form’, what has to be said that I haven’t touched on?  Only this: I can return to this poem for the pleasure of being reminded of how compactly the words fit the sonnet form and the rhyme-scheme.  I like how the verb ‘fathers’ in the opening of the octet is picked up by ‘sire’ at the start of the sestet.  I like how fire is invoked across that span.  I like the way a fertile mind’s confidence in caring for a poetic seed contrasts with the sad and lagging feeling of uninspired emptiness.  I like the way that emptiness would dearly love the honeycomb of the mind to buzz with life.  I like ‘The roll, the rise, the carol, the creation’.

       I’ve not sought to deconstruct this poem psychologically, sociologically or politically, bringing out its foolish assumption that poetry has value, showing how after all it’s a product of an age and place, full of self-contradictions.  That is, I’ve not used tools that are terribly academic and up-to-date.  But I think I’ve sufficiently shown why I think this poem is fine and what, by implication, other poems that aspire to greatness must be like, though in other ways.

       As for poems that are merely good: luckily the world is full of them.  ‘Merely good’ is not a put-down.  I set into this category a vast amount of poetry by modern poets and by the lesser gifted of the past, even poems in good but not arresting translations.  I find them pleasing for many of the above reasons, though I don’t return to them as an imperative for mental and spiritual food.

       When it comes to poems that are bad, by the strictures above they’re embarrassing.  They may give their writers joy but they show a limited knowledge of what can be done with words and have nothing of interest to talk about.  If they show daring, it’s far too often in just giving us lashings of scurrility.

   

Alan Marshfield

 

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